Motherless.
I recently received an e-mail with the subject line, “Feeling Motherless on Mother’s Day?”
It made me cringe.
I don’t like the word, motherless.
In fact, I despise this word.
When my mother died many years ago, I could relate to being motherless.
When I first heard the word, I thought, Yes, that’s me. Others do understand.
I was young–only 28–and extremely new to loss. I believed that Mom was permanently gone.
No wonder I was so sad. This belief brought tremendous pain.
But that was my experience then. There are no rights or wrong in grief, only what is happening in the current moment. There are no absolutes.
Meanings change.
Words that upset you now, may not at another time. You grow, evolve, and adapt as you integrate loss into your life. I now have compassion for my younger self, who was doing the best she could.
As time passed and I learned more about grief and healing, I came to realize that my mother was not gone. She had changed forms–moving from the physical realm to the spiritual realm. I realized I could hold onto her love, spirit, and essence…
She was still with me, but in a new, albeit different way. Not physically, but spiritually in my heart, mind, and soul. Our relationship continued.
This new belief brought solace rather than suffering.
Our love grows and expands. Her spirit is in how I raise my son, how I live my life, and how I value the preciousness of each day.
She is my mother. She will always be my mother. And I will always be her daughter.
I continue to love her in the present moment.
Love transcends even death.
Our relationship is based on the continuing bond of love.
On Mother’s Day…
Now is the time to cherish the love you still know.
Now it the time to be grateful for the love you continue to experience.
Now is the time to feel blessed for your relationship.
For those of you who may be missing your Mom’s today, this is not to diminish the sadness you may be feeling, but to encourage you to cherish your deep love. The love that is always yours, and the love that will carry you through on Mother’s Day.
Much love to you,
Chelsea
P.S. If you’d like to cross the bridge from loss to enduring love, order a copy of The Sudden Loss Survival Guide today.
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